twenty

I turned 20 this year and realized that I've accumulated quite a bit of wisdom throughout the ups and the downs, here are 20 things I've learnt.

1. crying is good for you, cry more often, cry in front of people to let them know it's okay too, cry alone, cry with God. I remember being in high school and being so proud of myself for not crying - I was "strong", no that's actually unhealthy. girl, cry.

2. There is always a purpose behind your pain so don't wish away the pain away, find the beauty in it. The number of times I thank God that things didn't go my way is crazy. At the moment pain feels like the end, but looking back I'm so glad that I went through it as it was truly the beginning of a blessing.

4. Don't take life too seriously, learn to laugh at yourself.

5. When comforting someone words aren’t always needed. Listen

6. Your appearance does not make you beautiful - your heart does! I'm soo glad that I learnt this early on in my life, knowing this helped me soo much and helped me dodge a couple of heartbreaks.

7. Don’t rely on people for your own happiness, don't put such high expectations on people - they're human too.

8. We tend to look at everyone as a finished product and us as a work in progress, give people grace. Grace is always the answer.

9. Before giving advice, ask them if they want to hear it.

10. Laugh as loudly and weirdly as you want to, snorts and all

11.Breathe. Like for real, actually, take 3 deep breathes - it helps to regulate your body. I learnt this during school when I had to remind myself to breathe, lol like I actually would catch myself holding my breath without realizing it. Breathe

12. Be slow to anger and quick to forgive, raising your voice in anger is never okay.

13. Choose the people who get to speak into your life carefully.

14. Joy is not the absence of suffering, it is the presence of God.

15. There's a season for everything, honour your season.

16. Let yourself be loved and believe it when they say it. (still learning this daily)

17. If you ever have to compromise your values, it isn't worth it! Please please please understand this, especially the young guys and girls - you are soo valued, don't ever feel like you need to cheapen yourself to be wanted.

18. You become the people you surround yourself with!

19. Allow yourself to feel heartbreak, stop running from it.

20. Wait until after high school to start dating, believe me - one of the best decisions I've ever made

Honourable mention:

Celebrate. The small victories and the big ones, celebrate your first sip of tea, celebrate you getting out of bed, celebrate seeing your friends, celebrate the first bite of your food, celebrate hearing new music, celebrate meeting new people, celebrate the person you're becoming