mental state

Have you ever felt like you're going backwards? Maybe you've just recently gotten out of a relationship and you're starting to figure out life without a person, or you got declined from a university and you have to reapply, or you've failed at a business or a friendship and you feel like you're back at square one. If you feel this way, you're not alone. I've been feeling like this recently like my life is on pause and I can't find the remote. It's under a couch cushion and I don't have the energy to look for it.

It's been a couple of months since I wrote that, and unfortunately, it remains true. It's not as bad as that paragraph makes it look but it's pretty much close to it. We have 3 months left of this year and it feels like I've accomplished nothing. It feels like I've literally been sitting in one spot for the past 9 months. It's difficult to see all that I've done when I'm in this state of mind. It's difficult to feel like anything I'm doing is making a difference when I'm in this state of mind. I had covid recently, it hit me pretty bad - most of my days were filled with naps, headaches, body chills and night sweats. Getting back into the rhythm of life was difficult, finding energy felt draining, walking was tiring and having no taste and smell just added to the limbo of feeling like everything was meaningless. After I got better we went to connect group and we got on the topic of Joseph. Ben began to explain the life of Joseph and how it was filled with many ups and downs. He mentioned that a lot of Josephs life before becoming ruler of Egypt was setting him up for it. That those moments that felt like the pause was actually just preparation for his purpose. I encourage you to read the story of Joseph, I'm looking at the part where he was thrown into prison because he was framed as an adulterer.

Genesis 39:20

But while Joseph was there in the prison, the Lord was with him; he showed him kindness and granted him favour in the eyes of the prison warden. So the warden put Joseph in charge of all those held in the prison, and he was made responsible for all that was done there. The warden paid no attention to anything under Joseph’s care because the Lord was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did.

At connect group, Ben explained that Joseph was essentially running the prison, the keeper of the prison didn't even look into anything under Josephs authority because God was with him. What seemed like the pit, or the pause was actually just preparation for his purpose. Those leadership skills he learnt in prison was setting him up for the palace. Beautiful.

Whether you're in the pit or the pause, we can either see it as just that or we can look through the perspective of Gods eyes and see it as preparation. Joseph wasn't necessarily born a leader, yes he had that dream but those obstacles he went through prepared him for leadership. The moment we begin to see our obstacles like that we realize that it actually doesn't matter where we're at because we know that it's all just preparation. When I first heard the story of Joseph as a kid I truly thought that Joseph immediately forgave his brothers but if you read the rollercoaster of Joseph seeing his brothers to him finally revealing himself it almost looks like Joseph had so much pain and anger that forgiveness didn't even seem possible. However, in the final chapter of Genesis, Joseph forgave his brothers.

Genesis 50:20 You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.

Imagine that, imagine excusing someone deliberate hurt against you because you see it through a different lens. Imagine seeing your situation, your pit, your pause differently not because you've reached the other side, or things got better but because you decide to see it through a different lens. Let's choose to see our pause as preparation and know that whatever happens within that, God can take it and turn it for good for his victory!

If you wanna take action to this message, take a listen to this worship song and begin to declare Gods victory over your life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNd-PbVhnvA